And now it's the Conservatives' Turn!

My previous post concerned a slip of the tongue by a Liberal-Democrat MP; this one concerns communicative incompetence by the Prime Minister.

Referring to what I suppose might be called a certain reluctance on the part of various multi-national companies and corporations to pay tax (quelle surprise) Mr Cameron announced at the World Economic Forum at Davos that they "must wake up and smell the coffee."

The giant multi-national that sells coffee-flavoured drinks, Starbuck's, has displayed a distressing degree of hyper-sensitivity to this comment, assuming that it was a "dig" at their organisation and in consequence has threatened to withhold a substantial investment (i.e. more look-alike near-coffee shops) in Britain.

I don't think that the P.M. intended to make a 'dig' at Starbuck's, though I suppose "wake up and smell the search engine" wouldn't work very well; no, I think he was being or rather trying to be, irritatingly 'modern' as perhaps he thought.  Horrible - and he was at Eton - the school that I wish I had attended!

However, given my recent experience at Starbuck's I am not inclined to be sympathetic to  managing director Mr Engskov's cries of anguish about what is simply a nasty piece of American business jargon.

But in future Mr Cameron might be better advised to say for example "In future, Her Majesty's Government intends to examine very closely the elaborate tax-avoidance schemes being practised by a number of multi-national business organisations."

There you are, Prime Minister, why not "Put it on the 5:15 and see if it gets off at Westchester" or perhaps a little more appositely, "Put it in your percolator and see if it comes out brown."

Until the next time.

UPDATE - UPDATE - UPDATE

27th January: The BBC reports that Starbuck's rejects suggestions that the company had reacted to the "smell the coffee" comment and that Friday's meeting with the PM had been scheduled for some time.  Perhaps the Sunday Telegraph allowed itself to get a little over-excited, though given the alleged proclivities of the Telegraph's proprietors I should have thought that the subject of tax avoidance was one to keep quiet about.  A storm in a (near) coffee-cup then perhaps?

Damned Inquisitive

At present I am undergoing a lengthy dental treatment programme.  Near my dentist, in Clapham, is a branch of Starbuck's and today after the dentist, I stopped there for a cup of coffee and to read my newspaper.

On ordering my coffee, I was staggered to hear the sales assistant ask for my name; this must be a new idea, since this information was not sought from me during my last visit just before Christmas.

My response to the request was 'why?'  The assistant replied that 'management' had ordered that this be done.  Of course I refused after which the fellow added that he thought that this was 'an American idea' or words to that effect.

I cannot imagine why Starbuck's needs my name and I consider it a gross impertinence to ask for it; after all, I am in the shop to buy a cup of coffee, not for example to order a bespoke suit. Sadly this sort of intrusion and familiarity is all too common (in both senses of the word) these days.

Given the bad odour in which the company is held following the recent revelations that it pays virtually zero Corporation Tax in this country, I recommend that it treads a little more warily in future.

I move that if anyone finds themselves subjected to this sort of request and does not wish to make a direct refusal, that they reply 'Mr Toad' or 'Miss Toad' as appropriate.

Until the next time.