Dumb Britain: Help Desk Woes

It was once stated that the Education Department of the London Borough of Brent spent so much money, that it could have afforded to send every child of school age to the famous Harrow School (which is in the borough) and have "change."

How many of the following unfortunates were educated in Brent I have no idea, but I suppose many other boroughs are the same - I wonder what these people learn in school? And why is it so expensive?

Customer: 'I've been ringing 0800 2100 for two days and can't get through to enquiries, can you help?'.
Operator: 'Where did you get that number from, sir?'.
Customer: 'It was on the door to the Travel Centre'.
Operator: 'Sir, they are our opening hours'.
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Caller:'Can you give me the telephone number for Jack ?'
Operator:I'm sorry, sir, I don't understand who you are talking about'. Caller:'On page 1, section 5, of the user guide it clearly states that I need to unplug the fax machine from the AC wall socket and telephone Jack before cleaning. Now, can you give me the number for Jack ?'
Operator:'I think you mean the telephone point on the wall'.
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Caller:'Does your European Breakdown Policy cover me when I am travelling in Australia ?'
Operator:'Doesn't the product name give you a clue?'
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Caller (enquiring about legal requirements while travelling in France ):'If I register my car in France, do I have to change the steering wheel to the other side of the car?'
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Caller:'I'd like the number of the Argoed Fish Bar in Cardiff please'.
Operator:'I'm sorry, there's no listing. Is the spelling correct?'
Caller:'Well, it used to be called the Bargoed Fish Bar but the 'B' fell off'.
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The caller asked for a knitwear company in Woven.
Operator:'Woven? Are you sure?'
Caller:'Yes. That's what it says on the label;Woven in Scotland '.
----------------------- Tech Support:'I need you to right-click on the Open Desktop'.
Customer:'OK'.
Tech Support:'Did you get a pop-up menu?'.
Customer:'No'.
Tech Support:'OK. Right-Click again. Do you see a pop-up menu?'
Customer:'No'.
Tech Support:OK, sir. Can you tell me what you have done up until this point?'.
Customer:Sure. You told me to write 'click' and I wrote 'click''.
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Tech Support: 'OK. In the bottom left hand side of the screen, can you see the 'OK' button displayed?'
Customer:'Wow. How can you see my screen from there?'


Until the next time